beginnings of a new one.

oh what little faith i have to try and try
staying here
and the distant trumpet sounds within me cry
please be near

courage is of willing heart and humble state
wanting more
and the distant pathway winds toward the gate
what's in store...in store?

running down into the sea to wash away
all the fear
arms held open toward the sky, round they sway
falling tears

car of my dreams?

the truth is, i don't have one. everyone has a dream car, it seems.

in high school i wanted a 69' Mustang...that was high school. it would be fun to drive a VW golf...or a mini coop. but there isn't a car i dream of having.

Artghost.

Artghost is 2 independent designers, Eric Adler and Liz Wong, working out of Seattle. they handcraft everything on their site. their retro 50's paintings and greeting cards are great...hope you see this and laugh like i did.

Tire Swing.

"Joey never met a bike that he didn't want to ride.
And I never met a Toby that I didn't like.
Scotty liked all of the books that I recommended.
Even if he didn't I wouldn't be offended."

love this chorus...good job Kimya Dawson.

Most.

in 2003, this short film came out. Most is a Czech film with English subtitles. i saw it last weekend for the first time. i wish i would have seen it sooner. it is incredible. truly.

at times, i become numb to the idea of the cross...being that i have been constantly reminded of it and it's significance in my life since i was little. i take it for granted. the concept of sacrificial love was renewed in my mind and heart this weekend after watching this short film.

i ordered 2 copies today. if you haven't already watched Most and would like to, i would love to let you borrow it.

sweet Jo.

i realize it can be awkward to blog about your friends when they are an actual 'blog friend.' i just have to. i have a friend, and many of you know her...her name is Jolleen - also known as Jo Jo (not to be confused with Jodeling).

it is hard to write in words how sweet Jo truly is. there are few friends in life who give, encourage, and love you at all times. Jo is that friend to me. she is always steadfast. always trustworthy. always loving.

last night, i had a show at Flying M. Jo brought me a card and the most adorable vase you have ever laid eyes on with flowers in it...just to say good luck. she also brought me a card for my first (bigger) show a few years ago - and i still have it in my guitar case.

all this to say, i am so grateful to have her in my life. everyone needs a Jo Jo.

watching houses.

we went on many road trips growing up. as we drove through city or countryside, i would always watch the different houses we passed (as much as you can watch driving 60 mph by a house). i usually didn't notice what each house looked like - i was looking for signs of life in or around the house....kids playing in the yard, the soft glow of a lamp in the front window, people watching television, etcetera. what kind of family life do they have? do their parents treat them well? are the kids slobs? i wonder if they have traditions? these are the kind of questions i would ask. i always hoped for the best.

i drive by many houses each day now...except i am the driver. and i usually notice what the houses look like....the color, style, yard.

i want to be a watcher again.

Cliff.

Cliff is a computer technician. he works with companies all over the state, ours being one of them. he is a quiet man...stands 6 feet 6 inches tall...has wiry black/gray shoulder-length hair and wears old school glasses (that are pretty awesome)...i would guess he is 55. i think Cliff is misunderstood by people...mostly because he doesn't say much...and when he does it is not always in a warm tone. however, his smile is warm and kind.

yesterday, my work computer was infected by a nasty virus so Cliff and i spent some quality time together - 2 and a half hours to be exact. and i learned that he is wonderful. in every sense of the word. i would even say that Cliff is hip. this is what started our 2 and a half our conversation...

*Melissa, a girl from work, walked up as Cliff was starting to look at my computer...she informed us that she was going to a concert that night...Cliff seemed interested and asked who she was going to see, which in turn she replied, "Three Doors Down." and Cliff said, "why are they allowed to make music still?" i tried not to burst into laughter, but i did...and Cliff and i had a friend moment."

i didn't tell that story to rip on anyone who enjoys that band....i told it to say, the ways you connect with people are interesting to me. so Cliff and i spent almost the entire time talking about music. he knows more about Robert Plant than anyone i know. he has seen Pink Floyd numerous times. he takes his daughter to shows...and great ones at that. talk of music led us to talk about life and God and politics and so on...

2 of my favorite hours were spent with Cliff this week. he is a gem. i hope everyone can meet him someday...maybe at a show?

Tom Petty, well said.

"Rock 'n' roll was one thing, and then they chopped off the roll and called it rock, which became a sort of umbrella term for anything with a guitar in it. Like hair bands. How could we possibly believe that? It's just gotten downright silly, to the point where now it's sort of become like professional wrestling. The fans know it's phony, but they don't care."

sad. very sad.

never before have i hit an animal while driving (not even a squirrel), until last night. it was sad, so sad. a raccoon (and a huge one at that) ran out in front of my car...there was no time to swerve. i screamed (into the phone, which Derek was on the other end of...and he thought i was in a wreck or dying). it felt like i ran over two huge speed bumps. in other words, i hit the poor thing hard. Derek tried to tell me it was ok and at least i didn't swerve and get in a wreck...but i felt so bad. and when i got home, i cried. i just cried and cried. you might think this to be ridiculous. and i would understand.

i remember once when i was a little girl, my family was driving back from a trip and i found a ladybug in the car. i named it and played with it all the way home. and when i had to let it go, i cried and cried. apparently a sensitivity toward animals (and even bugs...with the exception of spiders) has stuck with me.

this morning my dad (being the wonderful dad that he is) cleaned up what was left of the raccoon on the road. i am still sad. i really hope there are animals in heaven.

give a little whistle

those of you who know me well, know that i learned how to whistle a few years back....

i remember....i was sitting on a couch in the cutest brick house you ever did see (lived in by 3 of my friends and myself)....i was talking to Marc and Jamie about my inability to whistle. as i was expressing my concern to them, they broke into a beautiful whistling chorus!...and not only melody, but harmony as well! hmph! and i was determined to learn...

so, i would whistle on the way to work every morning...and whistle on the way home. and somewhere along the way, I GOT IT! and i can honestly say that i love whistling now...so much. there is never a day that goes by when i don't whistle for at least a bit.

i wrote this blog for 2 reasons: one - to encourage anyone who can't whistle that with practice and some hard work, you can. and two - to justify my every day whistling...sometimes it can be a nuisance....so i'll blame it on the fact that i was a young whistling bloomer.

(and one time, my and dearest Jo made a whole song out of whistling on her mac...ok, mostly laughing, but we tried to whistle...maybe it will be on the radio one day...hey, you never know).

i thought she was a joke.

honestly. there was a lady who came into my work today and i think she was made up. i have never witnessed someone so (i don't even know how to describe her). ever. i won't bore you with all the details, but i do think you might want to hear a few. it was quite hilarious.

let's call her Ruby...she looked like a Ruby. she is 57 years old. she looks straight out of the 1930's (huge feather hat and everything). so Ruby walks up to the counter, tells me her and her husband have a closing at 10:00 (in a very snooooty voice), and then proceeds to empty the candy dish into her purse. MOST people take a piece or maybe two...but apparently it was ok for her to empty it. she said "that's what it is there for anyway." directly after the candy jar emptying, she takes off her glasses, holds them out to me and says, "could you clean these for me?"....but it wasn't really a question. at this point i'm trying not to growl at her. so i cleaned them for her...i know, i know, i shouldn't have.

things happened between the glasses and when her and her husband were leaving, but it would take me an hour and 3 pages later to write everything. but i do want to share the most amazing act of Ruby. she gave some people at my work her business cards...she owns Big Dog plumbing...she told us, "if you ever have any plumbing problems or need a plumber, give us a call." (keep in mind that she had used the restroom before handing us these cards). not ten minutes later, my boss went to the restroom to find a pair of ladies underwear shoved down the toilet.....clever, clever Ruby. what we really want to do is mail them back to her in a baggy - with a note that says, "you left these."

so, that's my story. i didn't think people like Ruby really existed....with the exception of the ACTORS on Smile, You're on Candid Camera.